Of course, none of you were fooled (well, maybe a couple).. But this was our April Fool’s story…

ALTER BRIDGE sticksman Scott Phillips today lifted the veil on his latest project – a line of performance-enhancing tank tops for percussionists, proven in tests to significantly enhance the hitting power and overall technical ability of drummers.

The ‘D-VEST‘ – which breaks down as ‘Drummer’s Vest for Extra Strength’ – represents almost a decade of painstaking research by Phillips and his team of percussion physicists, who set up in a purpose-built lab in Maryland, funded by Phillips‘ little-documented sponsorship deal with local vest manufacturer, Bumo Vests.

The ALTER BRIDGE beat-maker said: “Drumming in the 21st Century has stepped up to higher and higher levels. I found myself putting in so many hours of practice, and then it hit me – free the arms and increase the power.

“I spoke to Dale Bumo, and he saw the potential immediately.”

Within weeks Scott and Dale had run countless tests and developed the prototype D-VEST – immediately unlocking new doors for Bumo‘s family:

“We sat my son Dale Jr at the kit – he’d never played drums before. It took less than a month for him to be playing beats that literally confused my dog into trying to eat itself – all thanks to the D-VEST.”

And it didn’t stop there.

The pair found that, by using a super-lightweight hem around the shoulder – which you can find in the pro-level ‘D-VEST LITE‘ model – they could reduce drag on the arms by an extra 12% – transferring that to extra hitting power.

The D-VEST even uses sewing techniques taken from the production of US Military-issue jumpsuits – which will be familiar to fans of both ‘American Gladiators‘ and ITV primetime hit ‘You Bet‘, increasing effectiveness even further.

“We’re still running tests,” continues Bumo. “But the trend definitely hints that, the less weight there is on the lower and upper arm areas, the less overall weight you will find in that arm, when weighing it in a true mass-based environment.

“Multiply that knowledge by two – one for each arm – and you can imagine the potential here. Don’t even get me started on what we could do for legs.”

The D-VEST hits stores in the UK tomorrow. You can get prices and details for all D-VEST products at this link.